Saturday, June 07, 2008

To you, the one whom I once loved so deeply

For three years, I’d been waiting.

Waiting for you to realise yourself,

And waiting for the time when I can finally be your priority.

I’ve learnt to stop expecting anything from you, really.

I want nothing and I gave everything I could ever to someone like you.

When many were against you and some even left,

I stood by you.

I find excuses for every of your wrongdoing because deep down,

I’ve been trying to forgive you as well.

I could see your shortcomings no more;

I just wanna be there for you whenever you needed me.

This is why I was thrown into turmoil of emotions and left myself there to bleed; alone.

And I did it willingly.

Every time when I decided to wave a final goodbye, you came back knocking at my door.

And with no second thought, I always allow you to come in.

Benji asked me a question one day,

‘How long have you waited for a person?’

I answered five hours, and then it struck me hard.

Perhaps the five hours were enough to determine how insignificant I am to you.

The worst thing is, I wasn’t even angry.

I was just, disappointed?

And I don’t feel just once, but again and again that

now i've lost count of it.

To be frank now,

I was torn apart that time but continued the pretentious acts

because I don’t want you to see it,

me in a devastated state.

I was shattered but I mended it myself.

Boy, do you even remember when that was?

Perhaps, everything between us ended at that very point of time; a year ago.

Like what I’ve always said, we can never change what’s been and gone.

I should have ended this long ago,

now allow me to say the final goodbye.

And i promise that i'll be happy from now on.

5:58 PM

'overdosed

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